trance

It's 4 in the morning and I just woke up from what I guess I would call a nightmare....and I'm terrified to go back to sleep. But it wasn't really a nightmare. I guess people call it lucid dreaming, where you feel like you're awake but weird shit is going on and people are talking to you...hallucinations. But you can't really tell people you've been hallucinating can you? Without them trying to get you committed into a mental hospital anyway. I drifted off at about two in the morning only to wake up two hours later to voices in my head. First I heard a deep, demonic-like voice saying "floor seven please". Then I heard someone calling my name outside in the driveway. Then I dreamt that I went to a movie theater with Brice and Carey and they had a gay Asian friend who kissed them both on the cheek. And when Brice kissed him back, he kissed him on the mouth too. The gay guy said, "oohh, I like Brice". And I started to say, "hey, back off" then I heard laughter. Wild laughter that sounded like a bunch of drunk people who had just heard something really funny. And I was sure I was awake, looking at my wall, but I didn't know where the laughter was coming from. It died down and then started back up again. I kept thinking, "How could I hear this laughter?" Then I thought, well if I can hear laughter, I can hear really scary noises too, right? I guess subconciously I pushed myself to hear the scary noises....and then I heard demonic laughter. And then I freaked out. My eyes were open, I was staring at my room, but shit was floating in the air. Like saucepans and stuff. And I saw shadows moving all around. Then I heard a really raspy "grrrr" noise. It was like the noise those demon things in the movie Ghost made. I couldn't turn it off. I couldn't wake up. I was powerless there, sitting in my bed, trying to move and call out but I was paralyzed. I felt my head pulsing and wondered if I'd ever be able to move again. I got a headache sitting there trying to come to terms with what was happening or figure out if I was awake or what..Finally I pulled myself out of it and turned on the light. It was the fucking scariest thing that happened to me in a long time....

It happened to me one other time, when I was 16. I was in Coeur d'Alene, Idaho for 4th of July weekend with my mom and younger brother and we were staying in my stepdad's aunt's house (she wasn't there). It was an old house and I slept in a little guest room. I heard what sounded like the voice of satan talking to me. There were fast, garbled whispers in my ear that I couldn't understand and evil laughter. I thought I was awake that time too. My mom said a "haint" got on me, whatever the fuck that means. I wish there was a way to protect myself from those "dreams"....I never want to be scared to sleep again.